I have a recent humor piece published in the upcoming Bacopa Literary Review 2020. It’s called, “Excerpts from the Classified Ads Section of Esoteric Creatures Monthly Magazine.”
It’s a magazine based out of Gainesville, FL and the literary journal for the Gainesville Writer’s Alliance.
It’s a short humor piece imagining classified ads written by monsters like puppets and killer clowns. Here’s an excerpt:
Mummy Requires History Lessons/Van with Tinted Windows
Listing is for two distinct tasks with preference given to applicant who can perform both.
First, I require an expert to discern my provenance and name. Exhibit label reads: Unknown Mummy, 100BCE-151BCE.
I don’t think this is correct.
Applicant must be able to read hieroglyphs, Greek and Hieratic script. Degree from institution of higher learning preferred. Field experience in archaeology with corresponding immunity to ancient curses a huge asset.
Second, I require safe transport from museum grounds where I am currently located.
A little bit about the employer:
Recently, I awakened to find myself imprisoned in a museum display. I wander the darkened corridors at night, various bandages rapidly deteriorating, especially around armpit area and groin. Be aware, I walk very slowly in a halting step. Must be able to distract or neutralize security guard who works night shift. New guard is cagey, as I accidentally strangled the former one.
Museum of Fine Arts. Massachusetts.
A link to the Editor’s Blog for the Bacopa Literary Journal is here.